Turkey Day List #2

Quick lil note: I am the worst at turning things in on time, even things like this. So bear with me pls. Pretend I posted this a whole month ago, cool thanks.

You know how this goes.

Mami & Papi: Change is inevitable. We are always growing, always learning, always evolving. It is not easy. I am proud of you. I love you both. With every fiber of my being. Please don't give up on yourselves. You have so much more to do. It is so close! You are so close! Sí se puede!

Yan Diego: I heckin worry about you sometimes, you piece of shit. Thanks for not being an asshole to me 100% of the time and also I think you're super talented and amazing and I brag about you every chance I get oops.

Javi: Dude you need to stop growing, it's kinda gross. Also please move to this side of the planet. We miss you so much it hurts sometimes.

Natasha: Life works in mysterious ways and even though the leadup kinda sucked ass, I'm glad the universe brought you to live with us. It's been such a blessing having you around and I don't think we could have gotten through the past six months without you <3

Suki: Mi amor bella y preciosa! No te apures, que ya ahorita llegamos a verte!

Nutella: Sigue haciendo tu cosa, nena.

Cinnamon: I hope you are enjoying your many naps on Grandma's lap, sweet girl.

Phoenix Emilio Salem Cruz: Natasha knew immediately that she was gonna take you home. How could she not? You fluffy black ball of fur, you. You've turned her into the wackiest cat mom out there, good job ;)

Sansa Scout Westley Wilson: You crazy, possessed demon, how I love you. I can't wait to get back to Vermont so I can force you to love me (even though you already do <3)

Abuelo & Bianelly: Son mis ídolos y le pido a Dios que puedan mudarse a la Florida seguramente.

Abuela: Sé que no siempre te entiendo pero mi mayor deseo es que jamás dudes cuanto te amo. Eres tan amada. Más que crees.

Grandma & Grandpa: I miss you guys so much and am super ready to see you guys at YD's graduation. It's been too long.

The Wilson-Fishers: Ditto.

Tío John & Gaby: You guys inspire me every day.

Joel, Melissa, Luis, & Noah: I'm so happy you guys are in my life, you don't even know. We have to make up for lost time but that shouldn't take us long :) I love you ALL to infinity and beyond!!!

Pri & Ana: My oldest friends. Las quiero more than you'll ever know.

Newsies Yamily: You pulled me out of the void when I needed it most. I Never Planned on No One Like You.

CJ & Nat: You two are the best thing that ever came from Newsies. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life <3

My grown-up babes, Lauryn, Kelila, Soren, Riley, Megan, Jay, Emma, & Julia, and my even older babes, Amanda, Caellum, Fonts, Mike, Claire, Thom, Sophia, Brandt, Tiernan, & Maeve: Everything I am today is because of every single one of you. I am so proud of and so thankful to each of you. I love you I love you I love you.

Jessica: You lunatic. I am SO lucky Vassar decided to pair me with you. I can't imagine myself with any other roommate. You make living with another person so easy (seeing as we're basically the same person in all the horrible ways) and coming home to you at the end of the day makes my heart happy <3 Here's to another semester of corndog eating and wine sipping and cliche movie bashing.

Charlotte & Leila: I'M SO GLAD WE'RE HALL NEIGHBORS LIKE I'M VERY HAPPY YOUR ROOM IS TWO FEET AWAY FROM OURS AND THAT WE CAN GO ON FUN MIDNIGHT ADVENTURES TOGETHER WE MUST DO THAT MORE OFTEN KAY THANKS LOVE YOU

Miles, Garret, Robin, & Sarah: I couldn't ask for a sweeter group of hallmates. You guys have my back, always.

Gabby: MOMMMMMM you are truly the best mom and I am convinced we are the best fellow group. Case closed.

Chloe: Hey thanks for being the coolest drama mentor EVER ;) I'm amazed at how you and I are so alike and how it's taken us this long to notice. I appreciate every moment I have with you, babe.

Linnea: You're a nut and I love you way more than eleven goat. More like eleven alpaca, cuz I feel like alpacas could kick a goat's ass.

The other Beats Suite members, Martin, Juliana, Ranza, Graham (& Jack): Thanks for letting me invade your space and for letting me love you unconditionally even though you sometimes have entire conversations with sounds and not real words and it makes me want to rip my head off :)

The Martins: Thanks for adopting me and for babysitting Saoirse and Soraya for me while I'm away <3

Evan: 'Sup loser. Thanks for picking me up from dates I don't want to be at and for bringing me food and watching drug-related shows with me and for not getting killed in Jiu-Jitsu.

Tessa: My dearest Tessa, you absolute goofball, I am so happy to know you and to be in your life. I look forward to so many more late-night chats and Saturday brunches. We'll have a grand old time.

Madison: Oh dear god, I couldn't be happier to know we're in Owls together at the same time in this universe. I couldn't bear missing a single one of your snarky remarks or witty banter. Keep unpacking, the world needs more of that.

Emma: Owls couldn't have ended up with a better pitch. You lead with such compassion and hard work and care. You help us all create seriously beautiful music and still manage to keep us laughing. We are all thankful for you, babe.

Sam: My darling Sammy, no one in this entire world has a heart bigger than yours. Whether you know it or not, you've brightened so many lives with your smile and your dino and your kind words. Please don't ever leave my life; I'd be lost without you.

Sabrina: Thank you for living your best, powerful life every second of every day. I have no doubt in my mind that you would do anything for any of your fellow owls—your loyalty is truly admirable. You are the living definition of Big Dick Energy. Also please connect me to the gay world I'm so scared kay thanks <3

Ariana: You are quite frankly (and I do not say this lightly) the FUNNIEST person I have ever met. Whether you mean to or not, your timing is always impeccable and I've had to stop myself from peeing at your jokes on several occasions. Also, you are so sweet and the Peace Corps are SO lucky to have you.

Maisha: First off, goddess. Second of all, marry me. Thirdly, you are truly one of the kindest, most genuine humans I have ever had the privilege of meeting. That, and you've got a voice of pure velvet. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Elena: You absolute ray of sunshine! How I've missed you! I am beyond thrilled to have you back next semester because that means we'll all get to experience your radiant aura and the joy it brings.

Helen: I am so proud of you. Truly, you've been through some shit and yet you continue to wake up each morning and absolutely glow. Can't wait to have you back in the nest :)

Alexa: Hey lovely! I know we haven't spent much time together yet but I am SO excited to get to know you better and sing sweet, sweet music with you!

Gracie: I aspire to one day be as carefree, self-assured and talented as you are. Thanks for being a goof and 100% yourself at all times. It does not go unappreciated.

Alexandra: Hi hello I'm quite convinced you are an ethereal being not remotely from this world and you're posing as a down to earth, incredibly kind, witty human with the voice of a folky forest nymph. PS: You were the greatest Secret Snowflake ever! ILY <3

Delila: Laugh all you want but I've always been in awe of how poised and graceful and effortlessly cool you seem in every single situation. Also, ohmygod you're so weird.

Cameron: If Stevie Nicks ever had a daughter, she'd be you. You absolutely blow me away.

Eloise: You wild Aussie, you. I'm so hyped I get to spend the next four years singing with you, love!

Derek: Another year with you as my friend :)

Luke, Kota, Ben & Jared: I've learned so much from you.

Paul O'Connor: I'm in love with you, didn't you know? But also, I'm sure your girlfriend is delightful so don't mind me.

Greta Thunberg: You are so powerful. Thank you for being the voice many others don't have.

Zendaya: We've been here before. Hi, I'm your future wife.

Hunter Schafer: My newest, queerest obsession. Everything about you. I love you so much.

Eva Noblezada: No one has ever drawn me in so quickly.

Lauren, Maria, Emma, TingTing, Darya, Gibi, Sarah, Grace, Mads, Erin, Chiara, Abby, Bekah, Jojo, & Caroline: My sweet angels of sleep, how I love you.

The Weinreichs: The things you've done for my family I could never repay.

Madrina: I could not afford my school books otherwise. I miss you all so very much.

Barbara: Thank you for keeping my head intact.

Titi: I see you everywhere. Thank you for not disappearing on me. Te quiero.

I am so blessed.

Hasta la próxima,

Much love xoxo

Maya

Productivity Levels These Days, Amirite?

Hello hi hello so y'all can ignore this post it's sorta more of a word vomit thing for me to feel like I did something like I accomplished something during this holiday weekend because otherwise I'm gonna start being self-deprecating and shit and it's gonna be real ugly and not fun so I decided I would list shit off that I did so I feel like a productive human being because sometimes I only feel valuable when I am useful yafeel so anyhow here goes

I handmade eleven holiday cards with all my artsy arts and crafts things

I single-handedly bought the food ingredients we needed in order to make thanksgiving happen with my own damn money

I made banana bread muffins for said thanksgiving feast and didn't burn them even a little bit

I wrote my first turkey day post and submitted it for y'all to see

I watched The Sword and the Stone solely because my brother requested to watch it and even when everyone else abandoned the movie I stayed

I watched Captain Marvel with my dad even tho I'd already seen it because he hadn't seen it and I wanted to know his reactions

I socialized with my cousins Max and Ali when they came over to visit on the holiday

I ran the dishwasher twice and unloaded it twice and made sure the kitchen sink wasn't gross or gunky I left it fully clean

I helped YD efficiently pack all the things he needed to bring back to school because he's useless at packing but also I live to feel useful to people so

I accompanied my dad to get his paycheck deposited and then helped him pick out stuff for YD to get clothing-wise because YD hardly ever ever ever gets new clothes and he was in need of them and the things we got were nice and I am happy to see him happy and I'm happy to see my dad happy because he made my brother happy idk it's just nice

I also got new running shoes for the first time since I was twelve and I'm really excited about not slipping around on the ground anymore since my new sneaks have grips on the bottom unlike my old ones

I helped acquire snacks for all because I am organized and get things done quickly and efficiently

I accompanied Natasha for two hours while we dropped off YD at his bus station so he could get back to school and we went to see a museum for a little bit and got to the station with plenty of time so YD could pick a seat he actually wanted and it was nice and we were glad he go there safe

I ran errands for my dad and picked up house supplies

I made myself and Natasha taquitos when there was nothing else to be had and they were delicious

I made YD a peanut butter and raspberry jam sandwich with a side of clementine and a glass of milk because he hadn't eaten anything all day

I played and snuggled and cuddled with Phoenix and Scout for hours and hours because I want them to know that I love them like I want them to really really know know that I love love love them with all my heart my whole entire being would do anything for those two

I provided people with alcohol and stories and passwords and so I felt useful again which was nice

I listened to a ton of new ASMR to go to sleep

I unpacked all the clothes I wanted to leave in VT and I put away the giving away items and I did my laundry and folded my laundry

I dreamt about a wedding

I showered and did a painful facemask and moisturized

I packed away all the things I needed to bring back to school

I slept when I needed sleeping and I woke when I needed waking

I hope getting that off my chest feels better soon I really do

In the meantime ciao los amo los quiero pórtense bien y todo eso dulces sueños muah

Turkey Day List #1

Hello, my dudes. I hope you all had a fabulous Thanksgiving (if you celebrate that type of thing) and I hope you can forgive me for not posting this three days ago—I was busy making some DELICIOUS banana bread muffins for my fam. Also, I was wine drunk so you can imagine...

Anyhow, here goes the age-old list you've all been waiting for:

Technology: You allow me to connect with those I'd otherwise have no means of reaching. Thank you.

Banana Bread Muffins: When the rest of the world was sour, you were sweet.

Wimpfheimer: You reignited my love for working with children and I am so lucky to work at such a beautiful place.

Saoirse the Succulent: My beautiful, darling girl. I'm sorry the windowsill gets so cold at night. I wish I could warm you up and keep you happy all the time.

Poe the Printer: The goodest boi there ever was. Our little hardworking man. Jessica and I are so proud of you, buddy.

Everest, Hobbes, Charlotte, Muffins, and Nox: Welcome to the club.

Jessica's supercool Fancy Lamp: I would have been knocked dead in the dark of night if it weren't for you. Plus, you're just kinda all around rad. Couldn't have asked for a better room lamp.

Raymond House: All Hail the Rat King.

Hallway 3 Cen: Thanks for putting up with drunken laughter and a cappella sing-ins and Halloween eggings. You're the real MVPs.

Beats Suite: My home away from 317. I am so glad I became an official suitemate. As stated on the wall of rules. It's a thing now.

Disney+: Where have you been my whole entire life? Every single episode of Suite Life? Yes, please.

The Deece's Late Night Corndogs: Truly, I am convinced you're injected with hallucinogens or some other weird shit. Why else would Jessica and I lose our fucking minds so frequently?

The Library's 24 hour Section: Bro, you've seen some shit. Let's keep that between ourselves, shall we?

Baldwin: Horrific as you are at times, you've helped me through days I didn't think I could step out of bed, so thank you. Really.

Express: For feeding me speedily when I would otherwise have skipped a meal.

Drama 102: Odd and strange and wack and awkward and uncomfortable and wild as this class gets, I'm really thankful for the journey and the creative mind it has made out of me.

Dynamic Women: All the snaps. Too many snaps. This class slaps.

Conditioning Class: Tough as this semester has been, it always felt great to sweat and melt the stress away.

Pell Grants: Thanks for helping ya girl out.

Zoloft: Ditto.

Laser pointers: For providing endless entertainment to my two little monsters. You are a blessing.

All 10 Seasons of Friends: My god, the headaches I endured for you... Were you worth it? Probably not, but you made me pretty damn content most of the time and for that, I can appreciate you.

Potterless Podcast: My one daily indulgence that never fails to make me laugh. If y'all enjoy dumb HP trivia and puns as much as I do, go check it out.

His Dark Materials: I have a new addiction?

Euphoria: Zendaya and Hunter—you have my whole entire heart.

Pinterest: For housing all future hopes and dreams.

Lin's Gmorning, Gnight: You pulled me out of the scariest 24 hours of my life (with the help of my precious Linnea) and brought comfort when I didn't think there was any left in the world. Thank you.

Midnight walks through the Fog: You know why.

I know holidays can be tough but hey! You made it past this one alive! I'm so proud of you!

Stay oh-so-super-warm and accept my love in the chilly days to come.

Hasta la próxima,

Much love xoxo

Maya

The Longest I've Ever Stayed

I've been meaning to post this for a hella long time but I got caught up in things. oops...

As of last week, it would have been exactly two years since I left Vassar. So, technically speaking, this is the longest I've stayed at college ever. Like ever ever. And I dunno, I'm pretty proud of that :)

We're already more than halfway through the semester so I have quite a bit to catch you up on (I promise I'll try to be as brief as I can possibly stand.)

First, maybe I'll introduce you to some people:

Jessica is my roommate. My crazy, demented, neurotic, hilarious, brilliant, talented, kindhearted roommate. Living with her is such a blessing. I seriously could not pick two more opposite people in terms of interests, but holy shit do our living habits coincide. Some highlights of our roommate arrangement: the time Jessica spent 45 minutes recounting the entire plot of Shrek to us; the time Jessica baked two entire pies from scratch for our fellow group; the time I lit a candle that made our room smell like heaven on earth; the time we taught Garret how to put on a bra; the time Jessica got us both pumpkins and we named them Linus and Jackie (short for Ja-que-line); the time we both got high off of eating too many corn dogs and proceeded to cry-laugh for two straight hours; the time we accidentally almost watched porn in the Deece; the time we got caught up in gang shit; the time we both were avoiding contact with a certain boy; the time JESSICA BROUGHT BACK A RICE COOKER (now we can make rice in our room anytime we want woohoo). Anyway, you get the picture.

Gabby is our student fellow (at Vassar, they're basically our RA's except they can't get us into trouble, they're just there to look out for us and be our mentors and such). Gabby is a riot and a half. Beautiful, hilarious, loving, talented, avocado-bearing mother. She's been such a great help and is always such a joy to see around. Much love mom!!! xoxo

Our hallmates (otherwise known as our fellow group) are Charlotte, Leila, Garret, Miles, Robin, and Sara. Every single one of them is so wonderfully unique and silly in their own way. Jessica and I truly lucked out. These peeps are simply the greatest. (To prove to you how freaking much we love each other, we've decided entirely by our own free will that we want to have group dinners on Saturday nights).

Then we've got our newest Owl babies!!! Our nest was joined this year by Madison (love of my life), Eloise (witty queen), and Cameron (genuine goddess). The three of them have been such a lovely addition to the group and their voices are so gorgeous they make me *cry*

Of course, I've still been seeing a lot of Linnea and Evan though it's almost as if we're living in different hemispheres half the time. Schedules are some total bullshit. (I love that I've become an honorary member of the Beats suite—where Linnea lives with Juliana and Martin—because I get full access to a WHOLE ASS PUPPER AND HAMSTER!)

Speaking of schedules tho, I've had a pretty rad semester. Like, luck doesn't even cut it when it comes to how amazing my schedule turned out. I'm taking all classes I ADORE. Among them, I get to go to the gym and get credit, I get to learn special behind the scenes effects that go into theatre, I get to put on mini play productions every single week, I get to work my ass off learning music theory, and I get to ramble to my heart's content about intersectional feminism in Latin America. I could not be more hecking blessed.

My advisor Maria is in the History department (lmao) but she has been such a great help to me in figuring out what I want to do and which paths I'd like to take. Alongside her, I have to credit MaryJo (the head of the educational opportunity and accessibility office) who kept me from drowning underwater and to my therapist Barbara for keeping me afloat. Without them, I'd be so fucking lost. Like, without a doubt.

Oh! And guess what else? I love my job! For work-study, I work at the local nursery school and it is truly the most fun, rewarding, exhausting job I have ever had. I am so lucky to be there and to be learning from some of the most devoted and brilliant teachers in the school.

I should 100% be asleep right now so I'm gonna try to wrap this up yikes

Overall, I am having one hell of a good time. All the things that could possibly have gone right for me this time, have. I'm not trying to jinx it or anything, but I dunno. This time around feels different. I feel so much more ready for college and everything ahead of me than ever before. I'm excited about what I'm doing, I'm excited about where I'm going. Things are finally looking up. Despite all the difficult things and everyday obstacles, I am finally capable of slaying the hell out of them. Before I know it, it'll be the end of this semester and we'll be reaching into the next one.

And once more, since I should very much be asleep right now, Carpe Noctum.

Hasta la próxima!

Much love xoxo

Maya

Come See How The World Could Be Pt. 1

Hello, my dears. I began writing this the night of April 24th, but as you know, life gets the better of me sometimes. Anyhow, here's a post I've been meaning to share for quite some time now. Enjoy <3

*contains Hadestown spoilers*

*for real, if you haven't seen it yet do not read this*

*seriously, turn the fuck around and read something else*

*kay, whatever dude, you've been warned*

April 24, 2019. 7:30pm. Walter Kerr Theatre.

My dad and I knew what the story was about. I mean, we'd listened to the entire soundtrack on Spotify already and both knew how it ended. At least I did, anyway—my dad doesn't always connect the dots.

When he first asked me which show we should watch as our joint birthday present, Hadestown was honestly a plan B. I'd never seen Wicked before (I know, I'm a musical theatre abomination) so naturally, I pushed for that one first. Of course, as many things turn out to be, it was too expensive. I had to come up with a new plan. I knew my friend Claire had raved about Hadestown (thank you Claire) and even though I had had the soundtrack on loop for six months, it didn't occur to me I could actually go see it. The Broadway debut wasn't even scheduled until late April. But the universe was aligned and tickets were reasonable and so we decided to go.

The usual crowd of theatre-goers was there: elderly retired couples who need a way to spend their time; crazed NYU musical theatre majors who obnoxiously know every single detail about every single cast member's life, not to mention are singing the songs at the top of their lungs before the show has even started; elites looking to be noticed at a new and trendy social gathering; mothers with daughters and husbands with wives; and then people like us, who seldom get the privilege to watch a masterpiece unfold.

We piled into the theatre like a swarm of bees. My dad and I made our way up the steps to the mezzanine but the second my eyes landed on the stage, I couldn't move. Dramatic, I know, but true. A vastly bare stage save for a couple of barstools, tables, and upturned chairs. There was no sign of a pit, so I assumed the orchestra would be onstage. A jukebox in the corner. A spiral staircase. Exits. The whole space had a presence about it. Like we were about to watch something important. Like we were gonna watch something that mattered.

Everything the eye could see was earth-toned. Browns, tans, greens, blacks, reds. By the time we took our seats, it felt like a lifetime had passed. And it would take a whole other lifetime for the show to begin. Patience is not a virtue I always possess.

Finally, people started spilling onto the stage. One by one, they greeted the audience with a smile and a wave before setting up their first position. Naturally, the audience began to clap and cheer, eager for the performance to begin. As I had predicted, the orchestra sat on the far sides of the stage, acting almost as pub-goers and setting a more natural, intimate tone. Our beloved narrator, old man André De Shields playing Hermes, stalked across the stage, meeting each cast member with a meaningful gaze or a firm handshake—almost as if he were welcoming them into battle. It was a somber sort of thing.

Dressed in all sparkling silver, he addresses his crew "'Aight?" They respond, "'Aight."

Cue the blaring trumpet, tooting the first few notes of "Road to Hell." Instantly we are captured by the cast's innate ability to be connected to one another and the audience. We take Hermes's word as given—no one questions him or his glorious sass in storytelling. He introduces us to our players: the Fates, Hermes (God of Travelers), Persephone (Our Lady of the Underground), Hades (God of the Underworld), the Greek Chorus, the Orchestra, and finally our young lovers, poor boy Orpheus and hungry Eurydice.

And then Eva Noblezada (Eurydice) opens her mouth to sing, and the rest of the world is lost to me. "Any Way the Wind Blows" began and my whole body covered itself in goosebumps. Hearing the sinister plucking of violin strings, watching as the Fates took on the form of the Winds, watching Eurydice pack her few things hurriedly, it was like I was in it with them. Call me crazy, but I could feel the winds changing as it happened.

And then she meets Orpheus.

"Come Home with Me?" he asks.

He tells her of the song he's working on, how when it's finished, spring will come again. And then he'll make her his wife. He kneels and presents her with a red flower. Reeve Carney (Orpheus) does this with such a delicateness and vulnerability, you can't help but root for him. From the very beginning.

Eurydice agrees but won't give in without a fight. "Wedding Song" is charged with playfulness and sexual tension and I swear to the gods, the bisexual in me would KILL to marry both Orpheus and Eurydice every time I hear it. They tease each other, they circle each other, they giggle with an innocence only found in first loves.

And so Orpheus sings "Epic I", where he explains the ancient love story of Hades and Persephone. When he sings, it's as if time stands still. Like you're stuck in the most delicious jar of honey and can't get out (not that you'd want to).

But as soon as it happens, the moment is gone, and we're on to the next song.

Bam! Spotlight on a drunken Persephone (played by the brilliant Amber Grey) as she struts down the spiral staircase into Summer. In "Livin' it Up on Top" everyone and everything comes back to life. Everyone onstage springs into dance and laughter, which is such a contrast to the way things felt before. To my absolute delight, there's a Latin-feel dance break where they jam like there's no tomorrow and let me tell you—when a theatre vibrates with Latin jams, you'd have to be crazy not to enjoy it.

When it's time for Orpheus to give his toast, he says: "To the world we dream about. And, the one we live in now." Granted, I know this line is coming. I always know it is. How could I not? I've listened to the soundtrack for months, and yet it gets me every time. May we always seek a better tomorrow, but let us not forget the wondrous present and the miracles that can be achieved in it.

And then we get to remember how earth-shattering it is to fall in love. Orpheus and Eurydice fall into it right before our eyes. In "All I've Ever Known" Eurydice struggles against love, against falling, because she's only ever known struggle and hurt and heartache. The fear of falling in love is brought to life in a very real, tangible way. The two lovers end up promising the world to one another, unaware of the storms yet to come.

"Way Down Hadestown" finally introduces us to the king of the underworld, Hades (played by a domineering Patrick Page), who's come to pick up his wife Persephone. He's early, once again, but who could blame him? He missed her. With the collection of Persephone comes the changing of the seasons, and no one is ready for that. It's too early. It isn't time. But Hades waits for no one, so off they go.

Orpheus leaves to finish writing his song, the song that will bring back the spring, but he leaves Eurydice all alone to fend for herself in the wind. "A Gathering Storm" comes to twist a knife in their wounds, leaving Eurydice desperate and lost. Meanwhile, Orpheus attempts to write.

"Epic II"

The grounds open up and we descend into the burning depths of hell. Suddenly, we see coal miners drenched in sweat, muscles twisting tautly under their skin, dirt smeared across their faces, a dead look in their eyes—all indicators we've arrived in Hadestown. Just to further the doom and gloom, the Greek Chorus engage in a "Chant", and Persephone isn't all too pleased with her husband's new shiny kingdom. They circle one another like birds of prey, eager to feast on the other and tear them apart. All this time, Eurydice finds herself losing her battle against the cold, against the wind. She calls for Orpheus but Orpheus doesn't come. He's got to finish the song. A steady feeling of urgency weighs in on the audience. We know something's about to happen—and not something good.

Of course, Hades swoops in to lure Eurydice to Hadestown, offering her a deal she could never turn down. "Hey, Little Songbird" is a delicate dance wherein Hades acts as the serpent tempting Eve, in this case, Eurydice. He offers her food and shelter and a "soft place to land". The hungry young girl, desperate as she was, couldn't refuse.

After accepting her ticket to the Underworld, the Fates slink in like slippery black cats come to watch a show. Each moves just as gracefully, just as elegantly as the next, each voice just as velvety thick as the last. "When the Chips are Down" serves as a narrative of what happens to people when times get tough—what do you become when you've lost everything you have? What do you become when you've got nothing else to lose? What do you become when there's nothing left?

Resigning herself to fate, Eurydice sings "Gone, I'm Gone" as a final goodbye to Orpheus, who has yet to know what will become of her. Completely oblivious to what's just happened, Orpheus goes looking for her, only to find out she's gone.

Thus begins the song that from the moment I first heard it, moved my whole body to gutwrenching tears: "Wait For Me."

Hermes reveals that there's another way to get to Hadestown, a way that doesn't require a train ticket. Orpheus, desperate to see his love agrees to do whatever it takes. Turns out whatever it takes leads to quite a dangerous road. And this is why theatre became my very first love: the complete magic one can create just by adjusting a few lights, the journey you can take someone on with a simple melody, the transformation that occurs when you find yourself in a character's shoes, the amount of empathy you can have for someone who isn't even real... It's wild to me. It's magical. It's the best thing to ever exist. And every single one of those things is captured in Wait For Me.

I knew this song was coming up. Papi knew it too. And yet I still found myself utterly unprepared. Nothing can prepare you for the first time Orpheus utters those words with complete anguish and desperation. Nothing can prepare you for the feelings of loss and loneliness and despair and hurt and anger and hopelessness and fear that come attached to this song. Maybe it's 'cuz I'm an empath, maybe it's 'cuz I feel things far too deeply, but Wait For Me strangles my heart every single time.

I remember that was the first full pause the director decided to make. The end of Wait For Me had everyone in the audience gripping the edges of their seats. Me, on the other hand, it had me choking back strangled sobs and shaking as I clung desperately to my dad's coat, letting the tears run freely down my cheeks, down my chin, staining my shirt as they fell. I didn't care. I had never felt a work of art so deeply before. I didn't know what to do with myself. Truly. It took well into the next song for me to stop hiccuping and sniffling. Just... there are no words. Nothing I say could ever do that moment justice. It was the most magical moment I've felt in theatre in my life, and that is saying something.

Then came a song that hit just as hard but in a completely different way: "Why We Build the Wall."

Literally nothing could be more relevant in the USA than that right now. It sheds light on the twisted power dynamic between Hades and his workers, it shows him as a benevolent father figure just looking out for his children when in reality he is manipulating their thoughts and creating fears and threats that aren't there. Pointing to an enemy that isn't there. At this point, Persephone dresses in all black, no longer the fun-loving goddess she was before. She knows what Hades is doing is wrong, but she's too far drowned in alcohol and sadness to do anything about it.

Eurydice is last seen following Hades up the steps to his office, ready to sign her life away to a life of constant toil in exchange for basic human needs. Persephone copes the only way she knows how: "Anybody want a drink?"

Blackout.

Act I really left us with nowhere to hide. It asks that we come with our hearts on our sleeve, open hearts, open minds. It served theme after relevant theme—the notion that poverty can drive people to do things they never would've imagined, the idea that poverty and the poor are the enemy and we are to keep ourselves as far away from that as possible even if it means building a wall, what happens to us when we're so blinded by love that we forget to do the things necessary to keep us alive, the distances true love will take us when we work hard enough. I sincerely cannot explain how much this musical has affected my life, and this is only a recap of Act I! We haven't even gotten to Act II yet.

If you've made it this far and you still haven't seen it live, I strongly encourage you to as long as you come emotionally prepared to suffer quite a bit. Like I said, never have I ever been so moved by a work of art so strongly as this before. I mean it I mean it I mean it.

I'm sorry this has already gotten obnoxiously long, I just tend to stretch things out when I care about them. In this case, I care a lot lot lot. And you should too. Los quiero!

Hasta la próxima,

Much love xoxo

Maya

Maybe

Random prose written while listening to "ceiling full of stars" playlist on 8tracks. Thought I'd try my hand at some improv, who knows. Here goes:

..........

Hi I thought I would share this story with you.

Um.

Okay, well. 

We were running. And it was dark. Like late. And I could only see the back of her dress kicking up in the wind and my god she was beautiful.

It was late. I was cold but she wasn’t. She never was. She was always warm. She just radiated like that. We ran all the way to the bay. I wanted to keep running, go to the water, feel the rocks, pick up crabs, but she wanted to stop, so I did.

We stopped and I looked at her and she took my hand and I gasped because she felt like stars exploding a billion miles away. She laughed and so did I and we heard waves slink away into the sea. 

Her laugh sounded like wind chimes and sunshiney mornings.

She pulled me close. “Hey, you’re cold.”

“No, I’m not.”

“Uh huh.” She pulled me closer.

I wanted to stay like that. Stand there til the sun came up. Maybe she did too.

I wanted to sit there and tell her about why I like crabs and that sometimes the coldest mornings at the bay are the coolest and that she was just so unbelievably funny and how much I wanted to kiss her and that I wished we could just stay.

I wanted her to stay.

She tugged on my hand and I looked up at her. Her smile faltered. She knew it already.

“I know,” I said.

“I know you know. I’m sorry,” she said.

“Don’t be. I love you.”

“Don’t.”

“Okay.”

She sat down with tears in her eyes and kissed my hand. She loved me too, I knew it. She didn’t want to leave either, I knew it. She wanted to stay. Here. With me. 

“Don’t go.” I said.

“Don’t.” 

“Okay.”

I wish she was still here. I wish she’d tell me about what the sky is like over there. And why she doesn’t like crabs. And if she knows that her laugh sounds like wind chimes.

Maybe she’s still wearing that dress. I hope she is.

..........

I don't know what that was about really. But I feel like it's something that happened. Or could have happened. Who knows.

Hasta la próxima,

Much love xoxo

Maya

Vibes

Vibes
by Maya Wilson

You feel like jumping in puddles while wearing yellow rainboots.
You feel like extra gooey smores.
You feel like bare feet running through grass.
You feel like a pile of clean laundry that was left out so you snuggle and sleep on top of it.
You feel like when cats rub up against your legs.
You feel like the dust particles you see floating through sunbeams.
You feel like kids running along the shore with sand pails in their hands.
You feel like when a ladybug lands on your nose.
You feel like defrosting your feet by a fire.
You feel like big splashes and ocean waves and rustling leaves and butterfly kisses.
That's sort of what it's like.

..........

I wrote this poem over the summer for Kota, a very special human being <3

Enjoy your spooky October!

Hasta la próxima,

Much love xoxo

Maya