About Me, Myself & I

Hey guys. Fair warning: you're not at all obligated to read the following post 'cause I mainly wrote it for myself, but if you're still intrigued, feel free.

I was thinking a lot the other night (surprise, surprise) about a lot of things... One thing led to another and before I knew it, I'd come to the conclusion that I was absolutely and inevitably uninteresting in every single way.

So.

Here I am in the middle of the night, trying to prove myself wrong.

Without further ado and in no particular order, a list of things that make me me.

• 99.99999% of the time, I can't focus when music is playing.
• When doing homework or reading or writing or working on anything that requires focus, I usually put my earbuds in but don't play any music. It's not like it even drowns the sound out or anything but I guess it's just become a habit. As if putting on those earbuds would take me to my own bubble where I could work, uninterrupted.
• I'd love to be a shape-shifter.
• I'd love to live in San Fransisco or someplace in Italy when I grow up.
• I get extremely anxious/irritated when people don't text back right away.
• If I could, I'd eat Dominican rice every day of my life.
• I believe that there are creatures/forces/powers out there that we just don't know about yet. There's more unknown than known.
• One of my friends in 1st grade bit into my right arm to tell me that he liked me.
• Mosquitos should all die.
• I believe a woman should have the right to decide what happens to her body. Within reason, of course.
• I've grown up a cynic as a product of the urban jungle.
• My biggest insecurity has always been either my skin or my height.
• I'm deathly afraid of thunder. Somewhat less afraid of the dark. Fonts helped me be at peace with the latter one.
• I find coffee and tea both absolutely revolting.
• I don't like extreme rollercoasters.
• I secretly love jamming to tween-centered boybands such as One Direction and The Jonas Brothers... Whoops.
• Afraid of heights.
• Super self-conscious about my rambling. I fear people will quickly lose interest in me.
• 100% of the time, I have more thoughts than words I could possibly write down. It drives me up the fucking wall when I can't explain exactly how I feel.
• I'm fifteen and I still don't know how to do my own make up or walk in heels (properly, at least).
• Everyone that's met my parents says that I am an exact combination of both.
• I love it when people play with my hair.
• I pretend like I love all types of food, but I'm actually quite picky.
• I feel much too much for the world. Empathy is a bitch.
• I came out to my mom about being bi on June 28th, 2015. I haven't been disowned, so that's pretty wonderful.
• When I fall for someone, I fall for them hard. Goes hand in hand with the excessive emotions part of me.
• Ever since I dyed a strip of my hair purple, I felt more special, like I could be more of myself as opposed to a boring, cloned product of society.
• I wish I had the ability to communicate with animals.
• I wanna be book smart. The street smart part I've got mostly down.
• I love to be called pet names.
• I'm the worst perfectionist in the world when it comes to personal health: I'm the craziest night owl for most of the year, I don't exercise at all but when I do, I push too hard, and I forget to eat most days.
• I love to cuddle.
• I was raised a Christian and did my First Communion but decided against doing my Confirmation because I didn't feel connected to the church in that way. Although, I do find that I pray a lot more when I'm struggling. I'll take anything I can get to make it better.
• I rarely live in the real world; I spend way too much time daydreaming or fantasizing about the future.
• I want to stay in school for as long as I possibly can to open up as many opportunities as I can. Besides, the longer I can stay away from the real world, the better.
• I have a severe phobia of speaking on the phone.
• I despise 99.99999% of all country music.
• I'm afraid of being taken advantage of in more ways than one.
• I love to sleep on people (they're comfier than pillows).
• I hate horror/thriller movies. That's what gave me insomnia in the first place.
• I love to be taken care of but I also want to be taken seriously. Sure, being the baby is fun sometimes but other times you just want to scream that you've got it sorted.
• I can understand most accents.
• I have mixed feelings about school: I love to learn but I hate the work.
• I've gotten notebooks as gifts for years now. So many that I have an entire stack of empty ones in a drawer at home.
• I've been chronically anxious since 6th grade.
• I always focus on being the one to make a difference. If I can make one person's day by granting them a smile, I'll do anything I can to make it happen.
• I'm in love with slam poetry, musical theatre, performances, rom coms, dramas, and superhero movies.
• Ever since I was little, I had a tendency to... overplan things. Usually waaaaaay in advance. For my 10th birthday, I planned my whole day eight months in advance, down to the minute. I've fantasized about my quinceañera more than half my life, and let's just say I may or may not occasionally fantasize about my future wedding...
• I obsess over few things, but when I do, I never let them go: strawberries, the color purple, and dolphins, to name a few.
• I'm a neat freak most of the time. But mostly just with my own junk.
• The group of friends I've made at the Abbey are the first ones in my whole life that I've ever been entirely myself around.
• I remember most of my dreams.
• I'm a highly affectionate person.
• I'm very open about myself to most people.
• I suffer from severe laugh attacks.
• There are brief spurts of time where I completely forget the English language and just go off rambling in Spanish.
• It took me three entire days to learn how to put in my contacts when I was 12.
• I can't sleep on my stomach or I'll suffocate.
• I'm a master manipulator of my own mind which can be really scary sometimes.
• When I was 8, I used to sing myself to sleep with songs from The Beatles.
• I complain a lot about the weather.
• I still sleep with the same Mr. Bunny I've had since I was two years old.
• I lived in Barcelona for a brief period of time when I was very young.
• I randomly switch thinking in Spanish to English all the time.
• I've gone whale watching three times in my life, and not one single time have I ever seen a whale because my parents accidentally knocked me out each time with Dramamine.
• When it comes to learning the different aspects of theatre, I hate Improv the most. Now, watching trained professionals do Improv, that is definitely somethin'.
• Pinky promises are sacred to me.
• I've read the entire Harry Potter series seven times.
• I had to get special braces because I'm allergic to nickel.
• My fifteenth birthday was by far the greatest one of all time.
• I'm fortunate to have a pretty great relationship with both my parents. I definitely go to them for different things though... Mami deals with practical, logical, straightforward and girl things, while Papi deals with the emotional, philosophical and analytical things.
• If I had a pet dragon, I'd name him Pablo.
• I'd still watch the Backyardigans if I could.
• In middle school, I was the Queen of Dodgeball.
• I've eaten burgers the size of my face in less than two minutes flat.
• I can't paint nails for the life of me.
• Grocery shopping with my dad is one of my all-time favorite things to do.
• I'm super stubborn. Like, annoyingly so.
• I seem peppy and bubbly most of the time but the truth is, I'm more of a natural introvert.
• My dad was the one who got me into theatre. He wanted me to "break out of my shell a little". He's created a monster.
• My first crush was Simba from The Lion King. Closely followed by Aladdin and Flynn Rider.
• I used to think English and Spanish were the same language.
• I'm not good at summarizing. I'm too in love with details.
• I can't look at blood without having the urge to puke. Not even a papercut.
• I want to learn Italian and Portuguese more than anything in the world.
• I have a strange addiction to good smells. I think it's starting to become unhealthy...
• When I'm tired, I regress to the mind of a very loopy four-year-old.
• I look like a hamster when I brush my teeth.
• When I was six, I hated the name Maya so I made everyone call me Isabel for an entire year.
• I spend an embarrassing amount of time dancing in my room by myself...
• I get really whiny when I'm sick.
• I'm deathly afraid of taking risks but I usually push myself to.
• Yan Diego convinced me I was adopted when I was about 5 and I had somewhat of an early-life crisis for a while.
• My dad used to sing me to sleep every night until I was seven years old.
• I bruise easier than a peach.
• I choked on an orange when I was three years old and my Abuelo saved my life.
• I burn before I tan. It's extremely frustrating.
• I had braces for exactly two years.
• I have a terrible immune system.
• My family met Corbin Bleu while we were watching a show on Broadway in 2010 and the only picture we took with him was ruined because my little brother pulled the ugliest face known to man, ultimately destroying the memory forever.
• My favorite games to play as a kid were spies, mermaids, fairies, pirates and hide&seek.
• I'm obsessive about cutting my nails.
• I prefer socks to bare feet.
• I actually don't like Nutella very much. Sue me.
• My favorite snack is bananas with whipped cream <3
• Throughout my life I've wanted to be a ballerina, an astronaut, a teacher, an alligator, a secretary, the president of the United States, a squirrel, a pharmacist, a Disney princess, a belly dancer, a voice actor, an actress, a photographer, a chef, a singer, a writer, a director, Dora, a composer, a psychologist, a tree, and a medieval warrior.
• I never had any nicknames (apart from the ones my dad gave me) until I came to the Abbey.
• I'll only eat tuna the way my mom prepares it (mayo, lime, onions, and Adobo).
• There are multiple stories of me washing the dishes stark naked. Don't ask why.
• I used to spend hours in the bathtub pretending I was in a submarine, researching wildlife.
• I hate tomatoes.
• I'm constantly fidgeting or fiddling with something, whether that's tapping my feet, picking at my split ends or fumbling with whatever I can get my hands on. Staying still is just so impossible. And yet when other people fidget, it bothers the heck outta me. What a lovely hypocrite I am.
• When I'm nervous, I tend to pick at my fingers, look at the ground a lot or rub the bridge of my nose. A lot of giggling is usually involved, as well.
• My favorite ice cream is cookies 'n cream (or vanilla).
• I've suffered from migraines since I was ten years old.
• I prefer cold to heat.
• I've had surgery twice in my life.
• I've never broken any bones, thank God.
• I don't like wearing rings. They feel constricting.
• I hate flip flops.
• When I was in first grade, I convinced my friends that I was an undercover princess from Switzerland that came to save them all from our evil lunch lady.
• I'd convinced myself that I was gonna go my entire highschool career without ever having dated anyone and that I was gonna go to college completely unexperienced. It was a terrifying thought to say the least.
• I want to take photography really badly.
• I have a serious fear of red ants.
• My little brother and I have identical birthmarks on our right arms.
• The movie Hocus Pocus traumatized me as a kid.
• I have a box under my bed with all the writing I've ever done since I was five.
• I used to sleep with all my stuffed animals at night because I was afraid I'd hurt their feelings if I left one out.
• My main concern in life is being a good person.

Note to self: I'm not going to apologize for who I am. Not anymore.

Hasta la próxima,

Much love xoxo

Maya