Promises

If there's something anyone is to know about me, it's that I take my promises seriously.

It may even be childish how high I hold my standards for them. Some might call it absurd, but hey, if I'm too much for you, you most certainly may leave. Texted promises are important. Verbal promises are swears. Pinky promises are vows.

When you promise me something, it means I believe you. It means I trust you.

If you ever for a second didn't mean to keep up your end of the bargain, please do me a favor and don't even let the words come out of your mouth, okay?

I believed you.

I trusted you.

It tells me I put faith in the wrong person.

Look, I'm sorry I take these so seriously--I know I'm a pain--but please don't take advantage of my faith in you.

I'll be the first to admit, my trust is easy to be meddled with and manipulated and toyed and abused. I know that. But it does not give you the right to play me like some stupid pawn in your game, okay?

I don't want to be played anymore.

God forbid, you tell me you love me and then abandon me--then what?

Saying I love you is the biggest promise of all, so if you didn't mean it, why the fuck would you say it to me?

Those words spend way too much time tossing and turning in my head at night for you to spit them out like they mattered. Like you really meant it.

You said you'd be there and then you weren't. Why did you say it?